By living in Finland, and being able to learn about Finnish culture and the little differences between the two cultures (USA and Finland.), I have actually learned that there are some things that I just
CAN NOT change about myself! They are just ingraved in me from my own culture in the USA, and they are just little things that come naturally and without thinking about.
Ive been thinking about these things a lot, and a few of them actually tend to make me laugh! Ive gotten into a few very awkward moments by doing these things, and sometimes it makes other people laugh too!
So, as you guessed it- this is going to be a post about some things about my culture from home that is unchanging about myself, other things that I have seen about Finnish culture and the Finnish ways of doing things, AND little habits that I have picked up. :)
Lets just get RIGHT into it, shall we? ;)
1.) My American Smile
Oh boy...WHERE do I start?!
The typical American smile is smiling with your whole face. Not just with your teeth showing, but smiling so you see it in your eyes. (I dont really know how to explain it.). I ALWAYS made my last host family laugh because whenever we would take a picture, they would always comment on my smile and how "American" my smile was. :)
I remember taking a picture with my whole class, and when I recieved the copy of the picture, I couldnt help but laugh because I was the only one with this HUGE cheesy smile on my face!
The typical Finnish smile is generally just looking at the camera with a straight face, or awkwardly cracking a small smirk, which can be taken as a smile. (And hopefully that description doesnt offend anyone!)
Its very, very different for me! My host family couldnt help but laugh at me when they told me to try to make a picture with a, "Finnish smile". I couldnt! I physically couldnt keep a straight enough face! (I ended up looking angry or like I was taking a mug shot! I just CANT keep a straight face without looking angry!)
I am not at all in any way trying to portray the, "Finnish smile" in a bad light. I just think that its interesting how different things can be, even when just taking a picture. :)
2.) Smiling and Waving at random people
In Finland, it is very awkward to go up and talk to a person you have never met nor seen before. Its just seen as a, "no-no". Its not done very often, and usually it makes someone pretty uncomfortable and it feels a bit creepy sometimes.
Coming from the USA, I have a VERY VERY bad habit of waving at random people and smiling at everyone I walk by. I come from a small community, and in Oregon, I live on a big hill out in the middle of nowhere. When we drive home, we ALWAYS wave at people on the hill. When we drive past another car on the hill, we always wave at the driver. I guess its just WHAT we do.
When I came to Finland, it felt so WEIRD for me. It was suddenly CREEPY to wave at people, and I didnt know HOW to just walk passed someone without smiling or waving.
Unfortunately, I cant seem to stop smiling at people while I walk by them. Its just something ingrained into me, and I cant seem to stop. And to tell you the truth, I dont actually want to stop! :)
It almost feels as though this is everyone´s reaction when I wave at people I don't know...or at least this is how I feel on the inside!
3.) Being loud.
I KNOW what you are thinking...and I hate to follow the stereotype...but YES. I AM loud.
Its very interesting because before coming to Finland, I actually didnt notice how loud I REALLY was. Everything in Finland is just so quiet, and so silent.
I didnt really notice how loud I had the potential of being until I was walking down the street with another American Exchange Student, and we were turning heads everywhere we went! It wasnt that we were TRYING to talk loud, or that we were trying to get attention...it just sort of happend!
Of course we are not meaning to attract so much attention...I guess since our culture is just that way, that we dont really realize how loud we are talking sometimes.
This is what our faces generally look like when we realize how loud we are being...
4.) Talking with my Hands
I always talk with my hands! Everywhere I go. No matter if I am sitting at a desk, or standing up. Even if I am whispering or trying to explain a math problem...I talk with my hands!
I guess it just helps me explain what im saying better, and it helps me get my point across. (Im not even sure if this is something I did before I became an Exchange Student, or if I picked it up when I wasnt able to communicate!)
I talk with my hands both when speaking Finnish AND English, and to tell you the truth, I cant really tell you why!
People tend to laugh when I am having a conversation with someone, because I talk with my hands SO much! (And they tend to laugh even HARDER when I am having a conversation with another American exchange student, because he does the same thing!)
Im guessing that this is what I must look like...
5.) We like saying names.
Im not exactly sure WHY, but when I have conversations with other Americans, I have realized that we like saying peoples NAMES a lot.
"How are you, (insert name)", "Oh Hi, (insert name)" Annnnd you get the idea.
Im not sure WHY we do it, but we sure do...
I have gotten a comment or two about it, and to tell you the truth, I dont even realize when I do it!
A couple of my friends have given me this same exact facial expression when I use their names way too many times during a conversation...
6.) Eating with Both Hands
To tell you the truth, eating with both hands isnt something I am actually used to! The social "norm" in the USA is eating with one hand, and having the other hand on your lap, or just in general below the table.
We dont actually eat with a knife in one hand, and a fork in the other! We just kind of pick up the knife if we need it, and then set it on the side of our plate again until you need it again.
It was a little weird for me to learn how to eat with BOTH of my hands, and in a way it felt like I was multitasking for awhile! It wasnt that it was hard or anything like that; it was just different. And I had to learn how to do it. (As sad as that sounds!)
I felt like this every time I had to awkwardly eat until I finally figured out how to do it without looking silly!
7.) Not saying what you mean
This is sort of a big one. I have found that Finns say exactly what they mean; and in the USA we basically keep our opinions to ourselves and dont really explain how we REALLY feel unless you are either family or REALLY good friends with someone. (Depending on the situation and the culture of where you live in the USA.)
We dont want to hurt peoples feelings, and we feel bad being brutally honest about things unless we know the person really well or we are related to them. In Finland, people only say things if something needs to be said or needs to be talked about. So naturally, they say what they mean.
I have learned that in American English, "How are you?" isnt actually a question. Its a greeting. You never REALLY tell the person how you are; and instead everyone answers with, "Im fine, how are you?".
I cant really honestly think of a situation where someone tells how they are REALLY feeling when asked, "How are you?" If you honestly want to know how the person is, you would rephrase the question.
In Finnish however, the person honestly wants to know how you are.
I guess its just a culture difference!
This is a little exaggerated, but I thought it was funny: When someone insists you try something, and you don't like it- but you don't want to hurt the persons feelings!
8.) Apologizing a lot.
This one might be the BIGGEST for me, and the only I ABSOLUTLY cant change! I dont know WHY I apologize so much, but I do! I always say, "Oh, im so sorry!" or, "Im sorry!"
And people always comment on it and say, "Why are you sorry?!" and I have to reply with, "...I don't know, actually!" and then they say, "Thats weird..."
And its true! It actually makes people uncomfortable! Im not sure WHY I apologize so much, I just do; and it seems to be an American thing because the other American Exchange Students always apologize to each other all the time as well. None of us know WHY, its just something we do...we dont even realize just how MUCH we really say it!
I can imagine that we accidentally sound like this when we apologize so much...
9.) I like to talk...a lot.
In Finland, small talk doesnt really exist...and to tell you the truth, sometimes that's really hard for me! I never realized just HOW talkative I REALLY was until I came to Finland!
I have even been told by one of my Finnish friends that if I was a Super-Villain, my power would be talking someone to death haha! ;)
And im glad that Finns are so honest, because none of my friends are ever afraid to tell me to stop talking when they want some peace and quiet haha. ;)
I never noticed before how much I actually talk, and sometimes I feel quite bad about just how MUCH and how OFTEN I actually talk...
I don't know what I would do without my friend´s brutal honesty haha. ;)
10.) Casual Talking
In the USA, its really natural and normal to talk to random people. At the grocery store, at the gas station...its just something we do! We are super casual, and we like company. We like talking to people and being social.
So naturally, of course I learned pretty quick that this was NOT casual OR normal in Finland haha! :D
I had to kind of learn how to reproach people without scaring them away or coming off in a bad light. Its not something bad at all, and I think its a really good lesson that I learned about the culture in Finland!
Im betting that this is probably what a lot of people thought when I first arrived in Finland...
And that pretty much wraps up 10 cultural difference from the USA and Finland! Some of these things I had to relearn, and others I simply can not change about myself. I think its great how different the culture is between the USA and Finland; and even though some differences are bigger than others, I seriously love it- and Finland.
Ive learned so much about myself this year and I even realized things that I didn't even know were a part of my culture and myself! It has taught me to understand Finnish culture, and to notice the small and big differences between my country and the country that I am currently living in...and I wouldn't have it any other way! :D